Well Dave, I think the age is perfectly fine given your situation. You are monitoring him and being a part of this. Now, had you come in here and explained the situation a bit differently and said you left him alone with violent games,
then asked us if the age was appropriate, then I would've said, "No Dave. That's bad parenting on your part".
If a child has supervision from their parent while playing such games at this age, then I believe it's fine. You have also helped him distinguish the difference between reality and virtual reality. Now if you were wanting him to play these without your supervision, then I believe the best age to start would be around 13-14 or so. Teenagers start to have a better understanding of their surroundings and the media at this age (now granted, there are some teenagers that are just loons and always
will be).
I think it's a great thing that you're teaching your son about these sort of things at such a young age. You also set a good example for him, so at this particular age, he will follow what he sees. It's like a commercial I see every now and then on the TV, it goes something like, "Never forget. Your children will learn not from hearing with their ears, but their eyes. They follow the examples you give them when growing up by seeing you. Watching you. Never forget".
So Dave, what I'm trying to say is..I believe the age your son is learning these things is appropriate as long as you are taking part in this activity and setting a good example by letting him know what is real, and what is not. It sounds to me like you have this under control. For those parents that believe differently, I believe they are a bit insecure or jealous that you have been able to accomplish something they
should have been able to accomplish, but now that their
baby has grown up, they lost this opportunity which you have at the moment, and are blaming themselves for having a delinquent living in their household, disobeying orders, and not finishing their homework because they are too busy engrossing themselves within the only world they understand: Grand Theft Auto IV (or any other violent video game really).
I'm not a parent myself, but it is nice to know there is still some hope for our future generations by taking a look at Dave. Keep it up, man. By the age of 12, he'll be bringing you home the $5,000 prize and a trophy from a tournament for Soul Calibur VIII, lol.
EDIT:
A young friend of mine would beg to differ.
He says that videogames (specifically RPGs) taught him how to read.
I'd also like to add to this. I can say without a doubt in my mind that RPGs have indeed helped me learn to read as well. In fact..when I was very young, I had a hard time remembering my left from my right, so when I was playing Final Fantasy III on the SNES, I had to
force myself to remember if I wanted to perform Sabin's "Pummel" command properly. It was like the RPG practically forced me to remember it though, since I
had to execute it properly. It was during a boss fight and I couldn't continue until I did it right, lol.
So, after a few battles of using the move, I finally realized what was left and what was right. My father was a bit disappointed that I learned this way, but I couldn't care less what he has to think about it, honestly. I was able to learn more about English by playing translated RPGs instead of reading boring books given to us by our English teachers at school.
RPGs were not only fun because of the gaming aspect, but they were also a fun way to learn as well, since they usually involve talking with townsfolk to figure out where your next destination is. I found out how to do a lot of things from gaming though. It helped me with my math (for particular puzzles), reading, and science. It's no wonder I spent most of my time gaming in middle school and high school.
Now this isn't to say we should completely forget about our education system, but I do wish some people would lay off with this, "GAMING IS USELESS!" attitude. I've learned quite a bit from the world of gaming in the 18 years that I've been doing it. I'd hate to think what my life or intelligence would be like without video games.