Jokes thread
- Thread starter Blade_edge
- Start date
BlackDragon37
[12] Conqueror
Ah, OK. My bad.
Google have banned 200 terms from their search engine in a bid to combat child porn..
These terms include "BBC", "Priests", and "Thailand".
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In the Netherlands there is uproar over a white Santa Claus having black helpers as it reminds people of the slave trade.
That's truly shocking - I thought Santa Claus didn't exist.
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Why wouldn't Chris Brown date Adele?
Because he would be punching above his own weight.
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1.5 million Britons want to be buried with their mobile phones.
And if you answer it behind me in the cinema, you will be.
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I hate that they put "use by" dates on condoms. Like I'm not under enough pressure trying to get laid already.
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Some of the Asian lads in my town go round wearing T-shirts printed with the words "Sikh and Proud".
Come on, you're not fooling me. What they're really trying to say is "Don't go getting me confused with one of those fucking Muslim cunts!"
Google have banned 200 terms from their search engine in a bid to combat child porn..
These terms include "BBC", "Priests", and "Thailand".
---
In the Netherlands there is uproar over a white Santa Claus having black helpers as it reminds people of the slave trade.
That's truly shocking - I thought Santa Claus didn't exist.
---
Why wouldn't Chris Brown date Adele?
Because he would be punching above his own weight.
---
1.5 million Britons want to be buried with their mobile phones.
And if you answer it behind me in the cinema, you will be.
---
I hate that they put "use by" dates on condoms. Like I'm not under enough pressure trying to get laid already.
---
Some of the Asian lads in my town go round wearing T-shirts printed with the words "Sikh and Proud".
Come on, you're not fooling me. What they're really trying to say is "Don't go getting me confused with one of those fucking Muslim cunts!"
BlackDragon37
[12] Conqueror
I got the i of the tger.
K0rN_b4LL
[14] Master
I got into an accident and totaled a smart car today.
Fortunately my bicycle is just fine.
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Girlfriend: "Hey my friend got some extra tickets to the dance recital tonight, would you go with me?"
Boyfriend: "Ohhhh, I can't go because I have this thing."
Girlfriend: "What thing?"
Boyfriend: "A penis."
Fortunately my bicycle is just fine.
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Girlfriend: "Hey my friend got some extra tickets to the dance recital tonight, would you go with me?"
Boyfriend: "Ohhhh, I can't go because I have this thing."
Girlfriend: "What thing?"
Boyfriend: "A penis."
BlackDragon37
[12] Conqueror
Young people nowadays moan about having to work long hours for a pittance, but they don't know the half of it.
When I worked on the railways in the early 1940s, I put in 18 hours every day and got paid nothing. And I never complained once.
If I had, the Japs would've shot me.
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I've never seen child porn but I presume it's quite cute..
A kid dressed as a plumber with a fake moustache would make me go "Awww..."
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I'm gonna use the numbers from my gas meter reading for my lottery. It works for British Gas.
When I worked on the railways in the early 1940s, I put in 18 hours every day and got paid nothing. And I never complained once.
If I had, the Japs would've shot me.
---
I've never seen child porn but I presume it's quite cute..
A kid dressed as a plumber with a fake moustache would make me go "Awww..."
---
I'm gonna use the numbers from my gas meter reading for my lottery. It works for British Gas.