Ask a Virgin: Relationship Advice from Internet People

You know why most of you think you can't be a nice guy and get a girl? You're picking up girls in clubs.

The kind of girl who's looking for a one night stand or who'll advertise herself in front of a bar fishing for drinks is not looking for a nice guy.

Notice I say, the kind. As in there are multiple kinds of girl, and many different ways to catch one. You guys sound like idiots. Frankly I find your opinions insulting and degrading to women. My memories are filled with sweet girls who'd swoon when I kissed their hands or who'd take a walk with me and wrap themselves around my arm. And I was always a push-over, but they'd pick me up instead of walking on me. Truth be told. I don't know what else to say.


That's what makes it fun. It doesn't matter how it's done. And IMHO, I find nothing wrong with how you try to hook that chick to be yours.
1950's way, geeks way, jerks way, etc. Isn't the fundamental rule is: are you guys happy with one another? Call me an old-fashioned, but nothing makes me more happy than watching a couple enjoy each other's company. Flaws and all. And now I'm doomed to be the "best" friend but never the boyfriend. Oh well, I usually don't let that get me down by persevering for the right moment for the right chick. Call me optimistic. And man my head hurts slightly from venting nervously lol.
 
i think your head hurts from those last few pictures i posted. don't worry, it is just blood flow. you will come to terms with it, and eventually it will be seamless, i promise.
 
If by club you mean on campus, grocery stores, parties, park, convience stores, theater, and lectures then yea, I only pick up the girls from the club. I'm sorry, but callin' me an idiot for my opinion makes you an idiot. I can't help but feel the way I feel by seeing the things I see with my own eyes.
My apologies man, but I know what I've seen too and this "you gotta be a thug" mentality is bull. Makes me mad to hear it. Flat out. There's a lot of ladies looking for a man to treat them wrong, for sure. But they're idiots. Though it seems we have different styles. I don't "pick up" girls. I try to get to know them first, I actively work on them a bit and play around with them and I only ask them out when I'm pretty sure I'll get a yes. I'm not going to say I haven't run into a few stealth bitches or surprise idiots but I'm usually pretty selective and vet the prospects a while before hand.

The thing about it is....you will RARELY see me at any club, and that's real. I meet and greet women on a daily basis and truthfully, they've all had this same characteristics of bein drawn towards people who treat them like shit. When I'm goin to the cafe on campus and a chick says to a guy, 'you gay nigga' and said guy responds back with 'bitch shut the fuck up I ain't gay' and said chick says 'omg you have never talked to me that way' and she bats her eyes then you got no choice but to believe it! There's so many i've seen.
Yeah see. I have never gone out with a girl who just shouted at me "you gay nigga!". There's something wrong there. I know from the way you talk and the way you seem to hate it that it must be true. It might just be a matter of place but I think classy girls are around. I don't wanna sound racist but there might be less in the projects where thug culture is so pervasive. I'm from the inland empire in southern california, people and attitudes are probably different. But I don't think you, as a nice guy could exist if there weren't nice girls too.

And I'm sorry Ghengis that sounds like somethin' that happened in the 50's, not now-a-days. There's only about 10% at most that even want what you said in that post.
No I'm sorry. For you. Even if it's that 10%, then find that 10%. Just don't be telling me you have to treat a woman bad to hold her interest. I bet you would find it real interesting if some more of the girls from this forum would come in here and tell you their opinions.

The thing about it is I'm a nice guy by heart but majority of my hook-ups came from girls finding me attractive, or when I treated them like I didn't care what happened. Ugh...I almost named another scenerio, let me stop.......
I feel for you man, I really do. But it sounds to me like you're just meeting the wrong girls. Or maybe you're drawn to the types of girls that don't really make you happy. Or shit what do I know. I'm not an expert by any means. Whatever. We've just lived different lives. I wish I could help you, but I wouldn't know how.
 
LoL at IFB thinking the only way most guys get girls is by throwing money and their ego around. WTF are you talking about dude? I can pull a hottie just by making her laugh, shit a stray look and most are mine. You even made yourself sound pathetic because all you can get are rebound girls that are sad from having the players play them.

Your doing the same thing the other guys are. They are just better at it than you. I guarantee you, that you have to work 10X's harder than a guy thats a total dick to a girl just to get some or to keep a hot girl with you. Face it, girls like that shit... Whether they admit it or not, they like the assholes, the badboys, the rich ones, and the ones with big ehemm "Egos"

They dont like nice guys, sure maybe for a rebound to make them feel better about themselves, but after a while youll get old, boring, and they will want someone who's wild, crazy, mean to them, and fun again. If your nice all the time they dont really appreciate it, but when a guy thats always been an asshole is nice to them, wow watch them crumble.
Oh for fuck's sake.

1. You don't need to be an asshole to get girls easy.

2. Anyone who says that nice guys finish last are not talking about nice guys (who actually get more girls than the assholes period). They're talking about the clingy, needy pussies.

This idea of nice guys finishing last came from the outdated and damn wrong idea that in order for a man to get a girl, he should be doing EVERYTHING for her. If that's the case, the pussy puts the girl's value ahead of his own. He seeks her approval, not the other way round. This makes her value higher than his.

So why the fuck will any girl stay with a pussy unless it's just to make herself feel better?

Any man who seeks approval from others get nowhere in life, let alone pussy. The amount of approval any man seeks is inversely proportional to the amount of social approval they get. In layman's terms, the less approval you seek from others, the more dominant you look to others. It is the lack of seeking approval from others that attracts women.

And assholes are seen as people who refuse to seek approval from others. It goes against the entire idea of social mobility. There are social rules that must be obeyed, and these people discard them because in their eyes, they don't work.

Ever hear singers and rappers who in their music sing/rap about doing themselves? "I just do me" and other similar shit.

Same principle.

Friedrich Nietzche's idea of the Ubermensch/Superman (before his anti-Semitic sister managed to re-edit Thus Spoke Zarathustra after his death to suit her ideals [and he hated anti-Semitism BTW], which ended up being the foundation of Hitler's Nazism) was the individual who succeeded in finding out what THEIR OWN morals and ethics were and using those morals and ethics in their path of life instead of just obeying what society's morals and ethics were.

SAME PRINCIPLE.

People who don't seek approval from others divide opinions about them. They will probably have as many haters as there are lovers. It is the haters that call them assholes.

People who don't seek approval from others end up rewarding people for doing something they want with their attention and punishing by withdrawing attention. It is in particular THIS that attracts girls, as they get rewarded doing something right in the guy's eyes, thus giving them value in their actions.

No one finds value in what is easily gotten.You don't find value in the air you breathe unless it's taken away from you in some shape or form (poisonous gases, getting strangled, drowning etc.). The pussies give away their power way too easy to the girl they like. Hence the boredom and looking elsewhere shit. If any man wants to get and/or keep a girl, you gotta set the frame that your attention and approval must be EARNED.

"Nice guys finish last" my ass. Plus comme "PUSSYOS finish last".
 
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