Man vs Food

I went over to my parents last year, and my mom had just finished making Habanero poppers. That's right, just like a jalapeno popper, breaded with cream cheese inside.

I explained to my mother that Habanero's are literally about 60 times hotter than a Jalapeno (according to the scoville scale).

Long story short, I ate one... and I fell on the ground choking and wheezing for air. The next day I took the spiciest shit of my life.

The end.
 
Psylocide said:
I went over to my parents last year, and my mom had just finished making Habanero poppers. That's right, just like a jalapeno popper, breaded with cream cheese inside.

I explained to my mother that Habanero's are literally about 60 times hotter than a Jalapeno (according to the scoville scale).

Long story short, I ate one... and I fell on the ground choking and wheezing for air. The next day I took the spiciest shit of my life.

The end.
Click to expand...

Congratulations your story just won you this thread.
 
Psylocide said:
I went over to my parents last year, and my mom had just finished making Habanero poppers. That's right, just like a jalapeno popper, breaded with cream cheese inside.

I explained to my mother that Habanero's are literally about 60 times hotter than a Jalapeno (according to the scoville scale).

Long story short, I ate one... and I fell on the ground choking and wheezing for air. The next day I took the spiciest shit of my life.

The end.
Click to expand...

So a local burger place has a spicy burger that has levels of spices (like most places) that are: low, medium, hot, 911, and Kryptonite. When you order the Kryptonite burger they argue with you NOT to get it.

Let me restate this: they ARGUE with the CUSTOMER not to ORDER THEIR FOOD.

This is because they put big ass Habanero chunks right in it. People have been known to spill their guts because they didn't expect to be eating solidified RAGE, and couldn't take it.

So my two of friends order the Kryptonite burger each and are talked down to getting a 911 burger with Kryptonite sauce on the side. Friend 1 says: Ok buddy, we have to feel it out. Dip the burger IN the sauce and then w-" as Friend 2 pours the Kryptonite all over the burger. This means that its on, go big or go home. Except now they are eating a 911 burger TOPPED with Habanero chunks, a fusion not meant for this earth.

By the end of the meal they HAD finished the burgers, because they're idiots (and cheap) but had to order something like 3 drinks each and were getting constant refills. I have it on film actually, and will be showing it to NJ/NY people the next time I see them, because their comments/cries of agony are S tier.
 
Lol... aren't habaneros fun?

If I ever use fresh ones it is in mango habanero sauce. I use 2 mangos, and the juice of a lime to 1 fresh habanero and puree the shit out of it.

It's still got intense heat, but awesome on tilapia.

Anyway, I think that day totally showed my manly spiciness. I think after surviving a whole one at once, I can do anything.
 
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